Cheznie and Rio are the cutest little 2 year olds around.  They jammer on together like they know exactly what each other is talking about and I have my doubts if they can even understand each other- its adorable.

 Rio likes to love on his new sister.

 He still gives me kisses and hugs even when he's "not my friend anymore."  Starting a little before I had Mayan he has really attached himself to Brannon, so I'm missing that a little but he's still my boy.

 He came to me the other day with a tissue in his hand and said, "I need to blow my note (nose)." He had had a runny nose.  Shockingly on the other side of the blow, I found a half-cooked pinto bean that we think had been living up his nose for a week or so!!!  It was starting to sprout and Rio hadn't complained of it once!

"Don't miss it! Don't even delay"

 One of my favorite childhood memories is of our family going to the fair.  I don't really remember anything specific except that we went and the SCONES were good!  Oh, and one time my Dad bought an elephant ear- end of story.  So in the name of family tradition, I got this fanciful idea (Brannon's words) and we called the Nielsens and we drove to the LA County Fair!

 It was hot and sweaty but the kids had a blast- milking goats, cheering on pig races and getting freaked out by life-size (I exaggerate a "little") dinosaurs and small livestock.

 Oh, how sweet- our first picture as a family of 5, couldn't get any better than this- or could it?

 Of course, we had to end the evening with a little drama but anyhow - "Isn't it kinda fun?"

Belize's Developmental Kindergarten Class

Call me crazy but I feel like I could have another baby- like tomorrow.  The requirement being that Brannon have the same schedule he does for the next week (I'm going to miss it so much!) and the baby has to be exactly like this one:

5 weeks

 Belize

 Rio

Mayan

One in a Million

Every Sunday we TRY to observe the Sabbath.  For us this means attending church, primary, nursery.  SIT means doing things that help us think about Jesus Christ, spending time as a family- reading "The Friend" (a church magazine for kids), playing games with eachother, having family dinner, watching Veggie Tales (cause they have a moral ya know!) and refraining from watching our regular shows, playing sports, or spending money.  The other thing my kids LOVE to do is go to our church's website for kids- they especially love this segment- called "One in a Million".  Kids from different countries talk about why they are special and end by saying their name and "I am one in a million."

Belize started doing it last Sunday and of course, I had to get it on video.  This is what transpired:

PPD

Today I took a bath.

Postpartum despression is the pits.  Literally, a pit.  It's surrendering all control to an unrelenting master.  I experienced moderate PPD with Belize.  I felt like I could not physically control my emotions- either I was a volcano about to rupture, spewing hot lava at everyone in my path or a raincloud, so full of drops that I could burst at any moment, resulting in hours of tears.  I felt constant despair, isolating loneliness (even though Brannon was with me every step of the way).  I felt anger at the infant that I had brought into the world and anger at myself for feeling that way.  I remember calling Brannon at 3 in the afternoon, bawling, pleading, no- begging him to come home and take this baby (he literally hopped on his bike that minute and sped home, I think he was in the middle of a lecture).  Or when it took all my mental and physical strength to call for Brannon at 4 AM prevent me from throwing that crying babe in my arms out the window.  Or bashing my head into the wall, wondering if I did it hard enough, could I knock myself out?  I thought that it was normal, that every new mom feels that way.  Looking back, I realize I should have been highly medicated, it was unfair to me, my sweet hubby and especially to Belize.

Since then, with each child, the fear starts as soon as I see those 2 pink lines.  Will it happen again?  I can't handle it again!  So now, armed with knowledge and a plan, I face these very scary days.  I take a lot of naps.  I am writing down my feelings on this blog.  I have an AMAZING husband who ensures everything is taken care of (home and family).  I look forward to fun activities.  I take baths. I put aside cleaning for playtime with my beautiful children.  I am flexible.  I pray each time I get up with Mayan at night that I might love her.  Somedays, I am on top and accomplish quite a bit!  Some days, I feel the old feelings gnawing and I take it easy.  I can feel the thoughts creeping in, "You are miserable" and I scream at them, "You are not welcome here!  I AM HAPPY!!!!"

Today I took a bath.

At 2pm.

It felt good.

Let's rock

Remember how I told  you Belize was in a commercial?  Well- here it is:

http://www.hasbro.com/playskool/en_US/ELMO/play/details.cfm?R=6995B8C9-5056-900B-1026-B3F0502DC45A:en_US

You can see the back of her pretty little head on the right lower hand part of your screen at 18, 25, and 44 seconds into it.  Personally, I prefer the front of her cute little head. ;)

Some resemblance

In the beginning, Mayan looked a lot like Belize but now that she is coming into her own, she is starting to have a SMIDGE resemblance to me (go Gregg genes, we're making an appearance!). What do you think?

Not a very good angle on Mayan, but I think its safe to say that Nana and I look a whole lot a like- maybe if I stopped dying my hair . . . uh, not on your life. :)

Lil' Mayan

Mayan is only a few weeks old but already she has stolen our hearts! She is a wonderfully content baby and generally has a good 4 hour stretch during the night! She sleeps A LOT during the day but recently we've been seeing more of her awake time. She seems content to listen to her brother and sister run around. Belize and Rio have started calling her a "professional pooper" and Rio says, "We can only say that word in the bathroom" everytime I remark that she's pooped.
Mayan has the cutest little pucker face where she purses her lips! She always sleeps with her hand resting on her cheek unless she's swaddled. She fits just perfectly in the crook of my arm- sigh! I love her so much! That being said- I am still not a baby person but Mayan might just be the one to convince me otherwise.

Did you know that washing in oxyclean and then drying in the sun gets rid of old spit up stains? Thanks for the use of your line Kristen- again.

Little Miss Preppy K

Belize officially started DK! She wasn't scared at all and happily walked to school and into her classroom with Miss Polselli and Mrs. Holmes. Neither Brannon nor I shed any tears, we'll call it a success! She's continued to enjoy school and look forward to it everyday. Nana also started her on a chart and she gets ready BY HERSELF every morning! Including making her snack and getting her breakfast, what a big girl! She is Mayan's second mama and keeps asking me when she can pick her up (SCARY!!!)

In primary, she told her leaders that she had an announcement. So they let her go to the podium and she told everyone, that she had a new baby sister -presh!
She loves seeing Brighton during recess and walking together to and from school.
Belize started on a soccer team- the Yellow Butterflies. Brannon took her to team pictures and she had a GIGANTIC meltdown in the middle of the field in front of all the other parents and kids- she refused to get her pictures taken. When questioned about it later, she said she was too embarrassed to be seen in her uniform and the other kids would laugh at her (even though her team was wearing the SAME THING!) She didn't want to play her game later that day because, again, she didn't want to wear her uniform. She said in the car that she, "wished it were dark." We made her try it anyways, she scored the first goal and after that, she LOVED soccer!!! and can't wait til the next game. Too bad we paid a bucketload for those stinkin' pictures! I am trying to embrace my new title as soccer mom as I'm sure I'll have it for awhile. I really know nothing about soccer and even put her shinguards on the outside of her socks- guess I have a lot to learn. ;)

This is what followed the watching of the movie, "Rio".

Rio Bi Dio

When Rio isn't being a grumpy grumperson, he is a happy go lucky kid. Right before Mayan came he started pretending he was a baby in a high pitched voice so we thought we were done for, but turns out he is a pretty great big brother. He runs little errands for me like getting diapers and wipes and loves to kiss Mayan and sing her songs when she's crying.
We rented the movie, Rio and afterwards, as we were driving in the car, I hear him singing in the back seat, "Rio! Rio!" then to the same tune, "Belit name, Belit name"- I think he thinks everyone should have a song with their name in it!
His favorite saying is, "Holy Moly Waka Wolly!" I need to try and get it on video, think very EXCITED and high pitched!
He and Belize have started wrestling, which drives me crazy because its only a matter of minutes before someone is crying. I was worried for when Belize was in school but Rio has started doing imaginary play by himself and is quite entertained by animals and castles and marbles. He is so darling when he "talks" his little things.

Mom of 3? Seriously?

I've been pretty chill about the new addition to the # of children we have. I've felt rested, under control, patient, and relaxed.

But . . . . my mom left this afternoon and after almost 3 weeks of an extra pair of hands at all times, 24 hours a day- I. AM. TERRIFIED!!!! I caught a glimpse of the chaos yesterday as my mom and I and all the kids attempted the craft and grocery store. Not a long trip, mind you, but long enough for hell to break loose and me to practically sprint for the car to get home. All I could think of was, "how am I ever going to do anything without my mom?"

I'm pretty sure most moms go through a bumpy transition with each new child but hang on folks cause I'm pretty sure I've just stepped on a roller coaster who's brakes have been cut and there is no "finish".

HOWEVER, I am determined to gird up my loins and waddle into this new pond- to feel the splendor of the craziness , like the cool water in between my toes, embrace everything it has to offer- to laugh and say, "I love it!" I do love my kids, I just need to remember that when they drive me nuts and I've had no sleep. I guess I'll just have to pray. A. Lot.

Also- thank you Mom. From the most tender spot in my heart. Pretty sure you capture everything it means to be a mother. I love you!